Show #293

Hello Friends of the Garden!

Well here we are at the eve of New Years Eve. 2017 is coming to an end and giving way to 2018. The last few years I’ve had a quiet New Years Eve at my tiny little coast house. I know I’ve missed some fun parties back in Fresno with my friends but I’ve also appreciated the quiet, calmness of Cambria. No one indiscriminately fires off guns in Cambria. There are no sobriety checkpoints. There are no fireworks. By all standards it probably seems really dull to most.

To me, New Years at the coast is a celebration of the soul. It’s a time to take account and prepare to close the books on the year that is ending. As I’ve grown older I’ve been keenly aware of the miles as they click by on the odometer of life. When I look back at the miles travelled this year it’s easy to recall the pain, struggle, loss and stress. It takes effort for me to dwell on the high points.

I still haven’t grown enough mentally to rectify the imbalance. Any clear thinking person would easily recognize the folly of amplifying the failures while neglecting all the effort that went into the successes. Why is it “human nature” for many of us to be so critical of ourselves? This time of year even has a ritual that reinforces that “human nature”, resolutions. Some people make resolutions while other swear against making them but all of us think about them.

The litanies of improvements needed for satisfaction are wide and varied and many times reintroduced each year. It’s amazing anyone survives the harsh realities of the self-assessment process. I’m too fat! I don’t read enough! I don’t get out enough! I need to spend more time around the house! I need to clean the garage. I need to be a better friend to my family and friends and be there for them. I need to get my ass in gear! Why is it that “human nature” makes this list so easy to generate?

The obvious answer is indulgence, I think (I guess I’m not sure). This is a time when we become aware what we’ve done with our time. I love imagining what it the antithesis of this “human nature” might be like. I’m going to give myself a break more often. I’m going to be more spontaneous. I’m taking more time for myself. I’m setting aside time specifically designed for doing nothing. I’m going to learn how to relax. I’m going to spend as much time discovering what makes me happy as I do trying to fix the myriad of maladies that vex me! It just sounds wrong doesn’t it?

The whole thing reminds me of the movie “Office Space”. The main character is stuck in a malaise across several aspects of his life, specifically work and love life. At one point the main character agrees to attend a hypnosis session with his girlfriend. Under hypnosis, the main character is prompted to not let anything bother him when demands are made of him and further that he should enjoy himself. Before he could be brought out of the trance the therapist dies from a heart attack leaving the main character stuck in his hypnotic suggestion. The change is truly refreshing to observe! Makes you want to say, “Damn! I wish I could do that!”

This coming year will bring plenty of hurdles and highlights, just every other year. There’ll be times when you’re going to need somebody to pick you up and times you’ll need to do it for someone else. How are you going to do that if you don’t make time for others? If you rigidly followed your resolutions you’ll find that you’ll spend more time recognizing that there are people thinner, richer, more successful, smarter, faster, kinder, and more talented; than you will recognizing all the progress you’ve made. All you can see is where you need to go, not where you’ve been.

You may not face these issues. You may be well adjusted. You may have a handle on mental toughness. You may have all the answers (if not I know people that do)! The “Original Liar’s Paradox” (you’ll have to Google that) best describes what inevitably follows; “I’m always right!” That statement is an indictment of imbalance! If I’m going to make any kind of resolution it would be to seek more balance, more harmony for myself, and anyone I connect with. Yin and Yang baby!

Peace and Love to you all! Let’s all work together to make this next year one that we will cherish!

Mike

Christmas 2017

Hello Friends of the Garden!

Well, I guess much like the way we had that Solar eclipse earlier this year, this Sunday's show has been pre-empted by a long standing station tradition of playing Christmas Music on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. It just so happened that my show ended up coinciding with that Sunday. So, you guys get to take a break from me for a week! 




Let me wish all of you a very merry Christmas! Cherish the joys you have in your lives and let the burdens you carry rest for a little!
Peace and love to you all!
Mike

Show #292

Hello Friends of the Garden!

I was up early for a Saturday, 5:00 AM. It was still dark out; you could still see stars. None of that bothered me because I was on a mission! I’m cooking a brisket for a party tonight! Ever since I got my smoker I have had phenomenal results on anything I’ve cooked on it! To me, brisket is the pinnacle of barbequing! A good brisket is a wonderful thing!

I’ve written before on the religious-like following that this entire nation has with barbeque. Just like dialects, this nation provides a broad taste of variations on a theme! I have found myself subconsciously drawn in to this “Jedi” of meats counter culture. Funny, “Meat Church” comes to mind! Like I said it’s a religion to some! Central Texas is home to some heavy weight cooks and meatchurch.com has all kinds of information for a novice.

As a result of my inquiry, I’m cooking this brisket “fat side” down. I had always been a proponent of otherwise, but I was swayed by competitive championship barbequers! I’ve also trimmed much more of the fat off than ever before. You can learn a lot online. I watched videos with focused attention as to prepare and cook this brisket the way champions do!

Reflecting on my attitude about cooking made me realize a passion I’ve acknowledged but never given it the credit it deserves! Cooking made me want to study! What!?! Cooking made me want to watch videos over and over so I didn’t miss an important part. Cooking had me comparing and contrasting opposing views on specific strategies to insure success. It made me want a better knife!

I think this is my fifth or sixth brisket I’ve cooked since I’ve gotten my smoker. Each one has been better than the last! The last brisket was over sixteen pounds and it didn’t make it past 10:00! It was totally consumed, all of it! That was a fun party! I truly believe that the reason my briskets turn out so well is because of the passion I have for it. I’m not denying the pride that also comes with pleasing family and friends for something you took such care to prepare!

Truly it ends up a “win, win” situation! I get to feel good about my attempt at a Texas tradition and a bunch of friends enjoy the benefit of my zeal! See, this is the real point! If more people approached things with passion and the intent of pleasing people (i.e. making their lives better), then things would have to be better for all of us! With all the political drama and harassment going on a question keeps echoing in my head. Is this the best we can do? Are these the best representatives we can find? Where's the real passion for good? We have plenty of passion for power!

I don’t care if you’re a Republican or Democrat. Wouldn’t you want the best one you can find? It’s clear from all the news there’s plenty of swamp on both sides of the aisle! We should upgrade Congress. Imagine if all those people in Congress did their jobs the way I cook my brisket! Are these people really looking out for us? I don’t know!

Peace and love to you all!

Mike

Show #291

Hello Friends of the Garden!

Whenever I write this I always start with no idea at all, none! It’s usually affected by what I woke up thinking about or heard on the radio or saw on the news. Sometimes it can be influenced by what may have happened to me in the course of the week. I often remind myself that the real joy is searching to understand myself better and not for any kind of recognition or praise. I’ve always had many more questions than answers, so there are a multitude of things that tumble around in my mind.

There are so many things happening in this world and the supply of topics for explorations are innumerable! I love talking with friends, acquaintances, and strangers. It is interesting to me to hear what people think about almost anything. Most of the time I’m shocked at the level of ambivalence that pervades our society. My guess is that people don’t have the time to understand things that do not directly affect them. They form their opinions from a very limited set of sources.

I get it! I really do! We live in a very busy world. We live in a time that has more distractions than ever before. It feels like it’s easy to see, hear or understand the “what” with all the different avenues that we have to keep us abreast of the latest news. I don’t feel like we spend a proportionate amount of time understanding the “why”! “What” is easy, the “why” is much more intricate and far more illusive and almost always based in personal bias; I include myself in this description of the acquisition of “why”.

I have had a lifelong connection with my quest for “why”. My personal observation of my need to know the “why” has led me to being a study of the human condition. I have had the experience of living in several places in this country. I have had the luxury of traveling outside our country and making long time friends in some of those places. My lifelong collection of information has not been relegated to one specific location. I try to be aware of what people say, what they do and the conviction in their voice and action. I like to aggregate these inputs to form an understanding for myself.

I often have discussions with myself, in my own mind, to explore the things I don’t understand. The result has been a somewhat irritating propensity to being a “Devil’s Advocate”. I try my hardest to set aside “why” I believe the things I do and put myself in the place of others that do not agree with me. My thought is that I will have a place to begin my quest for “why”. For me the result has typically been that the answers are a lot cloudier than people wish to admit. It is far easier to simply say I’m right, you’re wrong and why don’t you get it!

Education has tried to address the skill of advocacy through formal debate classes. Lawyers are probably the best example of unbiased allegiance through advocacy. Lawyers jealously represent their clients regardless of their own opinions and attitudes (or they’re supposed to). Unfortunately, advocacy as it appears to exist in our present culture lacks empathy or sympathy (see last week’s blog). Even worse, the prevalence of the unwillingness to seek “why” people say and do what they do falls equally on all sides!

The complexities of our modern world have made the ability to relate to those people with polar opposite attitudes even more difficult. We all know “they” are wrong; we just aren’t willing to see any credence to an opposing position. When we speak of being “color blind” in a culture we are often talking about race. I propose that we are “color blind” to colors other than black and white. Gray is not a color that is readily recognized or even acceptable! Black and white only discriminates between groups of thought and practice. Gray is the unacceptable color of true application and compromise.

Black and white is soothing! Right and wrong are comfortable ways to presume superiority. No more thought, introspection or research is necessary with black and white. All men are gropers. All Muslims are terrorists. All (insert your chosen race here) are lazy. All guns and gun owners are dangerous. All rich people want you to remain poor. All poor people want something for nothing. All homeless people have criminal intent. All (insert your chosen race or gender here) are terrible drivers. Really?

I’m learning to embrace and enjoy “gray”! There’s a lot more “gray” in our world than “black and white”. Acknowledging gray almost feels like getting “partial credit” for an incomplete answer! I have thought to myself many times, “Huh, so one half of this country really believes the other half are idiots that are completely ignorant?” It can’t be that simple! It’s clear that we aren’t spending enough time looking at each other’s “why”! It actually hurts my heart for me to embrace the idea that my political persuasion requires me to dismiss half of our country as self-serving, unintelligent and ill intentioned!

I have had some discussions (sometimes arguments) with people about political ideology. I love to get to the point in the discussion that I propose the question, “So, would our country be better off if all (Democrats or Republicans) didn’t exist at all?” The most stalwart of people stumble at the impossibility of promoting such an extreme position. The wheels come of the cart at that point! Japanese internment, McCarthyism, and slavery (sorry Roy!) are just the prominent examples of absolutism when we got it wrong!

I always end my radio show with a plea for harmony. Oddly enough, harmony does not come from everyone sounding the same! Real harmony comes from a blend of voices that create a rich, beautiful full sound that complement each other! If I were to create a “flag” to represent my radio show it would be a giant peace sign on top of radiant lines coming from the center to the edge……………..all in shades of GRAY! Get used to it everyone!

Peace and love to you all! Even if we disagree!

Mike

Show #290

Hello Friends of the Garden!

I still enjoy reading a newspaper. There’s just something about actually holding that big piece of paper. There’s a sense of normalcy embedded in the morning ritual. Even the way each of us choose what order we read the paper reinforces a kind of individuality that subtly says something about your own uniqueness. We are free to neglect any section we would like to and we don’t even give it a second thought to jump right to our favorite part. Since the newspaper isn’t sequential you don’t have to read it in any order, the antithesis of a regular book. There’s a freedom in that that is comforting to me!

I’m aware of my own pattern for reading the paper. The one part of the newspaper that I’m convinced is regularly wrong or contrived is the usually the first place I go to! I always look at my horoscope first, every time I sit down to read the paper. I know better but I still do it. I know there’s no way that a horoscope can provide any kind of reliable guidance. I still spend the rest of my day looking for little examples of alignment with my predestined day! I know, really dumb, huh?

I guess my obsession with a three sentence ambiguous forecast of my day comes from a deep-rooted need to be prepared for whatever comes my way that day. I don’t rely on a horoscope as my only source of security in truth it is merely a curiosity. I have spent a lifetime of being prepared as a teacher. I realize the folly it would be to follow my horoscope singularly. I still read it first!

After I read my horoscope I read whatever headline catches my eye. I often enjoy reading the Editorial section. It is fun to see what is on the minds of people motivated enough to write to the newspaper. I read a piece in our local newspaper in the Editorial section today. This article was entitled “You can’t live without faith”. At the onset I prepared my mind for the inherently polarized religious opinions to come.

I came away from reading that article feeling conflicted. The article really focused on raising kids to go to church so that they will have the same solace as their parents when the truly difficult times come. The strength, commitment, diligence, and perseverance that come from attending church will enable our kids to endure life’s challenges. I felt conflicted because the article never really spoke about faith. It really spoke to the charge parents have to raise their children.

I wanted to read about faith! I wanted to see personal examples. I wanted more evidence so I could understand better. Instead it was more about a narrow reason why having kids go to church will prepare them for life’s slings and arrows. I get it, really I do! Having kids learn to behave in a social setting is a good thing! I’m not sure even over time that that will be the thing that helps them get through the loss of a loved one.

Some of the things you read in the newspaper will shake your faith. Sometimes I draw a parallel with “God’s Mysterious Plan” and my horoscope. Both seem to be subject to similar wide and varied interpretation. A favorite of atheists is the, “What part of God’s plan is rape, mass murders, child defects, (ad infinitum)?”  I have to believe that faith cannot be constricted to religion alone. I do not disagree with needing faith. I believe faith is what keeps hope alive.

Everyone hopes for something! Real faith might be better if it is balanced like a diet. It should be based on a lot of things, things you’ve seen and witnessed and things you haven’t seen. I have faith that Antarctica is cold even though I’ve never been there. Faith should be something that is grown organically, not something acquired by birth. If we put our faith in action those things we hope for are more likely to happen either religiously or secularly! Faith is multidimensional. 

Remember that mustard seed story? That may be just for me!

Peace and love to you all!

Mike

Show #289

Hello Friends of the Garden!

One of the things I’m thankful for on Thanksgiving is football! No, I’m not a fanatic follower. If anything, I’m becoming less and less interested in sports altogether. It seems that the instant access to media combined with the platform to express personal attitudes/opinions/beliefs have infiltrated the world of sport and tainted it with distractors. I’m thankful for football for the simple reason that it provides a simple, safer, more innocuous battlefield for friends and family with diametrically opposed political ideologies.

Validation is the motivator for most of these ideological differences. When two or more people are in full agreement with any topic or social issue a new truth is born. People are emboldened by numbers. When we agree with others we can stop seeking the truth because we have found the confirmation of our version of the truth. It is so important to be right but it truly has become more important to show that you’re wrong!

The security of finding likeminded people and the subsequent relief from defending your position leads to acceptance. A new truth is born! There is no longer a need to continually seek truth, fairness or equity. The allegiance of the likeminded can obviate the obvious by discounting incontrovertible facts by its origin or more precisely its originator.

Democrats are liars! Republicans are liars! Prolife supporters are liars. Prochoice supporters are liars. The network news is filled with liars. Fox news is filled with liars. CNN is liars! NRA members are liars! Gun control advocates are liars. Environmentalists are liars! Everyone is a liar! How is this possible? Why?

Worse still, after allegiances are established and entrenched, the systemic process of proving why everyone else is wrong becomes more important than why you’re right. The guise of altruism veils the ugly part of disagreement and that is pure, self interest at the cost of all others. All groups will tell you they are acting in the best interests of everyone. Try this one! In order to promote economic growth we must cut corporate taxes. Do you suppose those people that support that thinking also believe that a realistic minimum wage will support economic growth? My guess is NO!

The natural progression in this process of establishing the truth without continually testing its veracity is absolutism. Guns kill people therefore all guns are bad. Muslims commit acts of terror therefore all Muslims are bad. Democrats are economically unrealistic so all Democrats are bad. Republicans are socially unrealistic so all Republicans are bad. Fireworks cause fires so all fireworks are bad. Seems simple really, just get rid of the bad stuff and everything’s cool, like Jews or Armenians or Gypsies or “insert here your choice of detestable heritage”.

My friends and family constantly astonish me when they expose their absolutism by promulgating the notion that the world would be a better place if opposition groups could be eliminated altogether! If we could just get rid of all those stupid “insert your favorite detestable political party here”, we’d be so much better off! What is more ironic is that, regardless of education, neither side admits to being close-minded or at a minimum possibly wrong.

The trouble seems to be in the idea that we all succeed or fail by our own efforts and those alone! The more we succeed the more we insulate ourselves from maintaining sympathy. I feel like it must be a difficult task for Congress to have sympathy for American taxpayers because they lack empathy! Sympathy and empathy are commonly confused terms. Sympathy is when you feel sorrow from the circumstances a person is subject to. Empathy is when you put yourself in place of someone else and identify with the challenges they face. How can a citizen count on economic empathy from a congressperson when it takes millions to be elected?

Here’s the elephant in the room everybody! As awful as it sounds, we are going to have to pay attention and give credence to those we disagree with. We are going to have to decriminalize compromise! You can’t always get what you want but if you try sometimes you might find you get what you need (sounds so familiar)! How ridiculous does this sound, what’s best for everyone isn’t what’s best for me! Huh? Why is it so hard for everyone to see this? Once you believe you’re right you can stop thinking! Perfect!

Stubbornness can be a double-edged sword! Righteous indignation is a natural reaction to the recognition of a coordinated opposition. The extremism that usually follows paradoxically unravels the perceived truth. Try this one, bombing an abortion clinic to promote prolife! Or there’s, give more breaks to the rich so the poor can become rich too! Or there’s take away all guns only to killed by illegal guns or give guns to everyone only to be killed by mentally deranged citizens! It becomes impossible to know what to do!

It is time to be proud of compromise! Believe it or not, the founding fathers of our nation had to compromise on things they were diametrically opposed to. At one point our country was diametrically opposed on the issue of slavery, so much so that people needed killing to settle it! I feel safe to guess that most people in America would agree that slavery is a bad thing. This country became the great place it is because of hard work and sacrifice! Guess what? Compromise is hard work, really hard! Want to make America great again? Well, it’s not going to happen without compromise! Time to get on it!

Peace and love to you all (even the people that don’t agree with me)!

Mike