Show #238

Hello Friends of the Garden,

I built this one day when I.........

It finally feels a little cold, cold enough to enjoy a fire this morning. I woke up early, one of the side effects of being older I guess, at least for me. Two things I really enjoy are the morning and a fire! I always think of the Who's, "Blue, Red and Grey" when I look at at either end of the day sky! The cool crisp air, especially after some rain, and the crackle of the fire definitely promote a soothing, contemplative feeling. I have never felt bad about any time I've spent around a fire, alone or with friends! It has always been time well spent!

Marking the days!

It is truly amazing how time flies by! This time of year creeps up on you and flashes by in the blink of an eye! Little things mark time, like landmarks as they pass by. I've been driving to the coast for over twenty years and I remember how far it seemed the first time. Now it seems like a hop, skip and a jump and I'm there. Over time, familiarity made the trip seem shorter and shorter. Instead of thinking of the trip in one big bunch, it clicks off in little chunks.

I much prefer going this
way to the coast!

It's funny, sobering, ironic and eye opening the way a whole lifetime is so similar to that drive to the coast. We all share life's similar landmarks. Careers, marriages, kids, divorces, losing friends, losing family, and retirement are just a few of the milestones each of us go through. It's so strange how all these same events are experienced by so many of us and yet each instance is completely distinct and similar at the same time.

Not dark yet, but soon!

I had an opportunity to do the right thing this week. I spent an hour or more with my good buddy Mark out by his fire pit. Seems like ever since we lost our buddy Allen, the missing amigo, I've consciously closed ranks with Mark. The smell of the wood as it burned and the yellow light emanated by the fire set a peaceful tone. The ever present music playing low in the background, a whiskey on ice and the dark sky of night made it easy to slip in to a comfortable patio chair.

Our buddy Allen in my
sailboat at Millerton. 

I wasn't there for fun this time although it always is at Mark's house! I knew he had a lot on his mind. Mark's mother has begun to show signs of being unable to care for herself. Making things worse, Mark's mother lives in the Los Angeles area. The distance makes keeping a watchful eye on her more difficult. Mark is an only child so the sole burden and honor of caring for his mother is ultimately his to bear. Mark has being seeing this particular lifetime landmark on the horizon for some time now.

I was aware that Mark had had a difficult last visit with his mom. I wanted to do what I could so I headed over, just to hang out. We talked about all kinds of things, things we had answers for and many we didn't. I didn't pretend to have answers for Mark. I could only assure him that he is a good son, husband and father and that I have complete faith in him! 

When I finally left that evening I had an overwhelming sense of pride. I was proud to have such an honorable friend as Mark and proud that I could do anything to help him no matter how small. Mark told me earlier that he remembered when my Father passed away. He told me he was moved by my decision to call my Mom every day to talk on the phone. He told me it was an inspiration for him to call his mother more often.

Having such admiration for my gentle giant of a friend Mark, I never envisioned myself as having anything to offer by way of example of goodness! Yet, here was Mark telling me how I affected a change in him! I was caught off guard. I've always used self-deprecation as a shield to lower expectations of me. I'm so good at it that I have myself convinced of it at times! Mark made me lower my shield! 

My Dad!

This morning my wife gave me bag full of old receipts and bank statements from my Mom. They needed to be disposed of. I slipped handful at a time into my fire pit and watched them transform to ash. Beanie on, coffee in hand, I thought of Mark and my parents and stared into the fire!

My Mom!

Good friends, really good friends, are so important! You only get so many in life! Make time, make space, try hard to hold on, you can miss so much if you don't! I'm honored by all my friends and humbled by your kindness and graciousness! Hang tough Mark! Thanks for being my friend!

On to Show #238! Wow, it's crazy to me, #238, wow! Ok, I start out with first timers Robin McKelle & the Flytones and Charles Bradley. I continue with another first timer in Chris Jones & The Night Drivers and from there it turns in to some picking until it boogies at the end of the first hour. The beginning of the second hour is just beautiful songwriting, don't miss it! It starts to pick up steam again with Tab Benoit and then I end up being silly with, "Teenage Immigrant Welfare Mothers on Drugs", "Conservative, Christian, Right-Wing Republican, Straight, White American Males" and "Motherless Children". Sometimes I can't help myself! It's all just for fun!

Thanks as always Jerry and Robin! I know we've all been busy but I always know you're there! 

Thanks to all of you listeners and readers of this message! Please share my show with a friend that you think would enjoy it!

Peace and love, 

Mike